Doing Marriage Well

Make Sex Better: Put Your Spouse First

Doing Marriage Well — October 3, 2025. Paul examines how fear, embarrassment, and a lack of knowledge cause many couples to "put up with" unsatisfying sex lives, and stresses that you deserve joy and so does your spouse.Practical call to action: ask your partner what would make sex better, listen without expectation, and try to meet their needs out of love — not as a transaction. Putting your spouse first is how to do marriage and sex well.

How to Address Annoying Spousal Habits with Grace

This episode explains how to address small but annoying habits in marriage with grace. It advises being upfront about what bothers you, choosing a calm time, focusing on one habit at a time, and repeating requests patiently.
Paul shares how his wife called longstanding behaviours "40-year habits," used gentle reminders, and inspired mutual change. The episode shows that little changes can have big positive effects on a relationship.

Loving Acceptance vs Resentful Tolerance

In this episode of Doing Marriage Well (October 1, 2025), Paul explores the difference between loving acceptance and resentful tolerance. He uses everyday examples—picking up socks, repeated interruptions, and oversharing—to show how healthy acceptance is an intentional, well-considered choice made out of love and balanced by personal needs.Paul encourages couples to consider the long term: can you accept certain habits for years to come without bitterness, or are they hurting the relationship? The episode offers guidance on when to lovingly overlook small annoyances and when to set boundaries so acceptance doesn’t become costly for either spouse.

The Reason You Haven't Spoken Up Matters

This episode explores why spouses tolerate behaviours they dislike — fear, being taught to be "nice," thinking habits were harmless, not wanting to fight, silent trade-offs, or rationalizing away problems. Understanding the "why" is the first step to making lasting change.
When you avoid addressing bothersome behaviour, resentment and emotional distance can grow. The episode offers a reminder that you deserve peace in your marriage and that, with honest limits and some give-and-take, you can enjoy being with your spouse again.

Tired of Annoying Habits You've Put Up With?

On the September 29, 2025 episode of Doing Marriage Well, Paul and Lori explore how small annoyances and tolerated behaviours—like sarcasm, tardiness, messiness, bad hygiene, or constant interruptions—can build up and erode a relationship over time.
They offer examples to help you identify what you may be putting up with and share practical ideas for addressing those habits, so couples can stop living with what they no longer want.

Fixing Your Sexuality for a Better Marriage

In this episode of Doing Marriage Well (September 26, 2025), Paul examines how early influences — pornography, romance culture, parental messages, and church silence — shape and often distort our sexuality and hurt marriages.
They offer simple conversation prompts couples can use to uncover those influences, begin healing, and pursue the healthy, God-centered sexual intimacy marriage was meant to have.
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Your Personal Struggles Are Actually Marriage Problems

In this episode Paul explains how spouses deeply affect each other — for better and for worse. Emotional states like grumpiness, anger, anxiety, and depression don’t stay private; they ripple through the marriage.Because marriage creates a shared life, individual struggles become shared problems. That means each partner has a responsibility to manage their negativity and seek help when needed.Paul urges listeners to recognize the power they have to bless or hurt their spouse and to intentionally use that influence for good.

How Church and Friends Shape Your Marriage

Host Paul explores how attending church and surrounding yourself with Christian friends can strengthen or strain your marriage, citing research linking church attendance to lower divorce rates and higher marital and sexual satisfaction.The episode explains the importance of choosing a good, Bible-believing, pro-marriage church and warns how wrong doctrine, lack of support, or excessive demands can harm couples.It encourages intentional friendships and discernment in church involvement, noting that a supportive Christian community can make doing marriage well much easier.

How Society’s Influence Harms Marriages and Kids

This episode examines how cultural messages and feel‑good lies distort our view of marriage, encouraging selfishness and minimizing real consequences for couples and children.Paul discusses common myths—"all you need is love," divorce is harmless, and children are always resilient—explaining the harms these ideas cause and urging listeners to follow God’s wisdom for stronger, healthier marriages. Sexuality will be covered in the Friday episode.

Choosing Influences to Enhance Your Relationship

This episode explores how the people you spend time with shape your marriage, urging followers of Jesus to be influenced by Scripture and godly friends. Using Jim Rohn’s idea that you become the average of the five people closest to you and Hebrews 10:24–25, Paul shows how community can spur love, good deeds, and encouragement.Paul also shares research linking friends’ divorces to higher divorce risk and gives practical guidance: cultivate friendships that model healthy, committed marriages, watch for red flags, and make wise decisions about who you spend time with to protect and strengthen your relationship.